…Even Grandma is guilty today

Dear thieving bas***ds,

Thanks for at least being thoughtful enough to not smash in a main window….the cost to replace a smaller window will be minimal for this already strapped-for-cash gal. And thank you for not taking my hard- cover copy of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. I’ve been trying to reread it for months. I am also grateful you left the quarter on the backseat floor because it will now have to be saved for repairing the window you broke.

I am, however, very irate about a couple things. Firstly, you have made me feel very hateful things about people….and it’s a feeling I don’t enjoy. I have no idea who to blame…what you look like, or why you would choose my car when there were so many other nicer cars in the parking lot. I hate that you made me question “why me? and not them?” I shouldn’t have wished a break-in on any other non-deserving person, and I didn’t like those thoughts. I glared at everyone today, even the innocent-enough looking grandma-type who was trying to get into my building without an electronic key card. She was probably there visiting her grandkids and just got the entrances mixed up. Certainly, she did not deserve the daggers I shot her as she pulled and pulled on the door and then slipped in after I’d left the building. Secondly, you didn’t even have the decency to check the cd player for the cd that might have been in there. And there was one in there. I am quite certain that you, being the type of person who smashes in car windows and steals cd players, and I do not share the same taste in music. I, being an always broke yet very hardworking girl, went without 2 meals to buy that Maroon 5 cd. I went for 2 months not listening to radio stations and news broadcasts in order to play that cd over and over and over again. I am bitter. And now Maroon 5-less.

If I had been there when you so thoughtlessly and viciously cracked my dash to get to the cd player, I would have let you know that the cd/stereo was a Christmas present from my parents. I also would have let you know that I spilled a Mickey D’s Sprite on it last summer and now the Number 1 button sticks and flips to track 7 instead of 1.

So…I hope whomever you sold it to comes back to find you when they find the track changer switches to 7, a song I’m sure they’re gonna absolutely hate. Sometimes bad things happen to good people…but please remember that even

worse things happen to BAD PEOPLE.

So NOT sincerely yours,

gina